The selfless commission members behind MMC did not want public recognition of their tireless efforts, but we are forced to reveal them in rebuttal to false accusations levelled at us in a letter by the MCC (Issue 15). The truth is we have a group who are in tune with current medical practice, 17% of whom are female, and 17% of whom are from ethnic minorities (both well above the local average of 0% in our headquarters at the Royal Imperial Yacht Oriental Military Cambridge Club, Pall Mall).
Head of MMC
Prof Sir Ronaldson (Harrow, Oxon) is the man in charge of Mangling Medical Careers. Responsibility came at an early age for him, having to fend for himself during the Depression, as well as cultivating his moustache. Such skills and an aptitude for choosing the right parentage have ensured he is the best leader for MMC.
Deputy Head of MMC
Lord Balamory of Milton Keynes (Eton, King's) is the black sheep of his family, and after being turned down for other civil service posts, we created a deputy leadership post for him to fill in between grouse hunting and croquet.
National Lead Programme Project Supervisor
Admiral Archibald Doubel-Barrell (Winchester, Sandhurst, Boer War, WWI/II) is another committee member. Some have said his role is unclear, but it is actually self-explanatory. He supervises our main project, which is the national lead programme.
Chief Mugwump
Saruman the White joined MMC after being cast out of Middle Earth and finding himself without a job. He brings a fresh face and a decisive attitude to the job. Despite the career (and galaxy) switch, he is not afraid of taking control of doctors' training . Don't be worried if he refers to you as his 'minions.'
Honorary Junior Doctor MMC Representative
Cecil Bolingbroke-Waldegrave is here to give you a voice on our committee. He is the typical junior doctor, back when we attended hospital at least. As such, he has been raising the concerns deepest in your heart: How can we overturn the fox-hunting ban? Why don't we have salmon and caviar canapes at our meetings? Is there a Coutts bank branch next to my hospital?
Bringer of Teas
'Darkie' as she is known to her closest superiors, is not just a token member of the committee, but performs the vital function of not only bringing the tea, but pouring it out too. In her spare time we like to send her to pick the best leaves from Darjeeling.